Unending.

My declaration: I'm not dating until I am at least 30. The only exception to this rule being the event that someone comes along and has what it takes to prove me wrong. I am not looking for this person. You're best off not even trying. I'm happier on my own. I have gotten seriously swell at running away from happiness in any other body.

You're just a letdown; another one of my mistakes. I did love you, anyway, I always did and I always will. But not in the way you think, you and your constant overconfidence. You might say I don't know what I'm missing, but all I miss is you then. You now sucks, a lot. But I'm sure you're miles past reading this and further past caring even if you did. You're a failure.

Dear substance abuse,
You can go fuck yourself. I hate you for stealing amazing people and character traits in the people I love. You're not that cool even though everyone thinks you are. It's not finding religion that makes you mean, it's the things you take. Things no one can get back. You're a cleptomaniac, and you steal more than just cheap earrings and make-up and clothes. You take things that are supposed to matter. You take people's ability to be honest; you take all likelihood of people being able to actually keep plans. You make forgetting okay, and bad decisions funny. You make people stick in high school mentalities, and summer spills into fall. If I could sell my car or keep it far away, I would. I'd take any excuse not to leave until the day thankfulness translates to gluttony. I hate you being accessible. I hate you tempting people away from where they should be. And I hate you for making people forget who they really are. You're a killer. I will never be yours. Hunt someone worth your spell, because everyone close to me is too good for you.

There are days where I wish I could go back to the day I began thinking poison was okay. I lost my grip for awhile, but I found it. It's not so much that it changes only the habits of those that overenjoy it, it changes personality traits. People lose their regard for things that are important and their ability to not break dates. People and things become important that shouldn't be. Kids under 21 start to idolize the losers that supply their needs. The strength of the people you love's ambition gets weaker. Home stretches. Stomachs turn. Eyes turn into sprinklers. It's a heartbreaking transition. I am effected, but I'm done letting it. It's easy to let yourself fall to the typical side effects. Start fighting. I'll help you, anyone who needs it. Better yet, we'll help each other.

I spent $50 this weekend on essentially shoes and movies and food. Before that I hadn't spent much money here. I like that about this place. I still feel the push to get a job, but now I see that it's okay to kick back, and that I'm not going broke anytime soon.

I really do just want what's best for you. We're two different people with one uncommon bond closer than any I've ever know. I understand we're in different places; let me into yours and I'll help you find home, okay? I want you to be happy everywhere you are. I want you to know what it's like to be in love with time and place, and you can show me that it's worth being in love with person. I think you can really help me, and I'm stuck. I know I can help you too. Your three rules are very true and I intend to abide by them. I know you do too. I love you, for everything you do, for the success you have and mistakes you make. You've taught me more about the world, people, and myself than anyone else, and I'm not done learning. We can tear this place up. Why not start now? You'll always be the stars over treetops to me, my hero.

This is the part where you find out who you are. These are your friends, those who've been there from the start. So to hell with your bad news, dirt on your new shoes. We do more than get by. We run faster than life ever will; this way it can never beat us.