Before the Sun Sets.

I am an emotional wreck in the best way possible. I'm overcome by thousands of realizations, most of them positive, and I'm overwhelmed in seeking them, but excited at the same time. It's a mixed bag that has my eyes leaking with a smile on my face. Reach out to you, turn away from you. This has been a bittersweet two hours in contemplation of the past 154 days on one hand. On the other, we are six days from a milestone and an unknown amount of days from a breakthrough. But that's okay.

Time shouldn't be underestimated; it is valuable in solving some of life's most difficult periods. We're all restless and we're all impatient, and as a result, we forget to let time tick by and rush into things. I did that at least three times with you; I started out that way with you, but I never regretted it. I swallowed my impatience today when the sun was shining just a little too brightly to ignore. Those shoes were shelved and collecting dust, so I shook it and tested my stamina once again. I ran like I never stopped. Sure, I walked in between bursts of energy, but I enjoyed every ray I felt along the lengths of my arms and legs so long kept from being exposed. A tank top saw the sunlight today. All the while my lungs never felt like exploding; I didn't want to stop.

Red signs were my goal lines, but I often surpassed them. I'm in the mood to not just simply achieve goals today; I'm crushing them. I reread a day old epiphany and felt its current. Ah, it hasn't run dry and I'm energized. Endorphins and potential have me both eager for the future, but patient to let time unfold it in front of me. I woke up brand new in a room full of kids I know now that I will never forget. I missed nights like last. Just so you know, I love you all. I can feel myself acting on vows to become a better person. I feel right. My decisions feel right, nearly across the board.

My spunk is reenergized and refusing to be shelved, so I grabbed it and ran with it just like I did with those shoes. You have no idea what kind of rush comes with the feeling of knowing that this time, I mean it. I tried once before to close the book and failed. This time, my end is neatly tied. So take it in your hand and follow my lead or do something drastic, the only way my hands will even flinch toward that knot again. This time I'm strong, and it's a me you're not used to. I remember stamping irresistable across your chest. I remember all the more clearly erasing it.

Pictures are reminders of the best times of my life and who was contained within them. I refuse to make a stranger from a friend. It's okay; I swallowed my pride. It's overrated anyway, and I'm sure it's labeled deadly for a very valid reason. Today, I believe in myself, in my decisions, in the impact people have had on me. I'm not down and out. I found my stride in more than just hilly neighborhood sidewalks.

And I'm running with it, unstoppable.